Invasion of the Silver Foxes, or “You darn kids and your loud music”, or “Help I’ve fallen and I can’t get up…”

“The baby-boomers are coming. The baby-boomers are coming.”

How can those of us in Generation X cope? My advice to everyone is to start buying stock in Buffets, Inc. (The parent company of Old Country Buffet, and Home Town Buffet because they will soon be more common than Starbucks), Procter and Gamble (the makers of Metamucil) and Kiberly-Clark (makers of Depends). Hopefully with the rapid growth these companies will encounter in the next few years, the dividends will offset the increased burden on our payroll taxes to provide Social Security and Medicare to our aging populous.

Ok, maybe that was going a little far so we’ll back up the bus a little bit. Yes the boomers are retiring. Yes they will exhaust the current reserves of Social Security. Yes there will be way more disabled parking spots in front of the local Wal-Mart than there are now. Yes the roads will be packed with slow drivers. But are these bad things?

Socially this country may change somewhat over the coming years. The all mighty dollar drives things like music, movies, T.V. and such. Studios make movies and music that will appeal to the masses, so with seniors making up the majority we may see a shift in the subject material of movies and music. Granted this will most likely be a minor shift, but most likely we’ll see a small ripple. I’m looking forward to more enticing movies like ‘Revenge of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood’, and ‘The Bridges of Madison County Strike Back’. I can’t wait to see new shows of Punk’d : Nursing Home edition.

Given everything that’s been written lately about the Boomers, keep in mind that as a society we survived horrible events like Y2K, the cold war, the new Gilligan’s Island series, ChiPs (Erik Estrada), The Anna Nicole Smith show, and The Bridges of Madison County movie. The boomers retiring won’t kill our economy, or degrade the quality of our lives. Things will just be a little different. But I’m buying up the stocks I mentioned earlier (and possible some Pfizer stock to cover the Viagra angle).